Well, here is my attempt at putting some of my sexual advice into writing again. Keep in mind, everyone has different paces, different likes and dislikes, etc. Don't expect anything close to perfection out of this. Bare an open mind to the idea's and suggestions in here. For some of you this may be helpful, for some it may not. This is all stuff I've picked up from experimenting with different idea's with different people. Then learn more from them, and possibly pass that onto the next. This stuff has been tried numerous times successfully with numerous people. Don't get discouraged, it's just a starting point and not a place to get all answers. Those come from yourself.
The basics I'm very sure will be the boring part of this writing...
Some women go on with simple sex or masturbation, not really putting the time and effort into exploring their bodies further to learn more about what's really there to be found. Some just masturbate by rubbing clit until climax or ramming an object in and out till climax with maybe some clit rubbing. Or have sex and don't masturbate at all and leave it up to sex to find everything but leaving yourself not knowing where anything is to let your partner know where it is! I'm going to try and explain to best of my ability where some spots are you may be very interested in knowing. But I'm not going to be exact since everyone's body differs a little.
1. First of all is that infamous G-spot. What is that? Some say it doesn't exist, while some swear it's there. Well it is there, but sometimes people over exaggerate just how good the spot is so people don't even realize they've found it because it's hype was too high. Sensetivity on this spot does vary from person to person. It's not going to feel like a second clit, but it is a spot that's extra sensitive on the inside walls of pussy that is nice to pay extra attention to if you can. You will find this spot about 2 inches in, on your upper wall. Best way to go about finding it is trailing a finger or two inside pushing upward on the upper wall until you find a spot that's just extra sensitive over the rest of area. This spot may feel a little riggid. This would be your g-spot. Experiment with it until you learn how you want to hit it just right. Rubbing and tapping are most common. Keep in mind it's a spot that increases pleasure but not replaces it. It's not a clit replacement. To maximize results you'll want to find a way to hit it as well as clit to get two spots at once and increase the pleasure of your experience. If you feel a sensation to pee it's rathor common because of it's location and sensitivity. Just take it slow until this subsides and you get used to the sensations.
2. Now onto another spot that's deeper in that I honestly can't call by name since I don't know it. This is a spot that is also very sensitive but in a different way. Instead of an intense pleasure sensation like clit or g-spot, this spot will be more of a tickling and tingling feeling. Feels kind of weird at first but if you combine tingling with a clit and g spot it can create an overwhelming combination of fun. ;) This spot you will not be able to reach with fingers as it's too deep inside. It's kind of difficult for me to explain where it is exactly so I'm just going to show you the easy way to find it. This moves onto 3rd step.
3. Now I'm going to explain a technique that's very simple yet productive that will quickly help you find both of these spots inside within a couple minutes. This will involve having a sex toy or a partner that can assist you with reaching them all though. If you don't have any sex toys or partner to help out, there are plenty of substitutes that are actually quite common. Use imagination and find something to use. You will need an object you will be able to completely sit on comfortable without hurting yourself, so some things like a hairbrush handle will not work. Make sure it's a well rounded object with no uncomfortable points or edges. If possible aim for a flexible toy because an object that can't bend with body can give discomfort when shifting angles or positions. If you cannot find something perfect don't hurt yourself with your substitute. Continuing on now, you work object or partner in until your body is comfortable with size and you have it/them in you as deep as can go. Now you'll want to find a sitting position where you can spread your legs lean forward so your clit can find a surface to grind against. With a partner, you'll be wanting to sit facing away from them so you can lean forward good and the shape of their cock/toy will work nicely for this position. For masturbation, make sure you have that perfect object you could push in all the way so you can sit on it having it consumed in you basically. Now concentrate, not on object in you, but rather on grinding your clit back and forth on the surface that's under you, whether it be a chair, or someone's lap. Grind your clit into surface and let object or cock move on it's own in you. If you are at right angle it will be hitting not only g spot, but other spot deeper inside at same time. So here you are, pleasing 3 very nice spots at the same time, still maintaining free hands and not using too much effort into it except a good grind. If masturbating I recommend finding a nice soft surface that has a good edge to grind. A good suggestion is going to bedroom, getting cozy, going to edge of bed, one leg on floor and one leg folded on bed, then grinding the edge of bed letting your object move freely inside of you. Experiment with this until you know exactly where your spots are inside and you get a hang of it. Now your free to use whatever position you want once you know exactly how to find both of your spots you can hit them any way you can! The grinding of clit on surface won't work as good as direct stimulation but I suggest this position to help find the other two spots first. Once you have the focus on them you can use your hands on clit for even better stimulation and let the grinding now only aid the other spots and not so much the clit anymore. Good position to have one hand on clit and other working the upper foreplay or partner foreplay. Experiment with this a bit and you'll get it nicely. :)
I guess that leaves basics right there unless I think of more later. Now it's time to discuss the next thing. The incredible lovable orgasm.
1. Many women still struggle with having an orgasm at all. They masturbate, have sex, do everything they can but can't find it and get frustrated about it and it gets even harder to have one because of frustration. This is because the orgasm is a response to a need and desire as well as body. Stimulating body alone just won't do it. You need to stimulate mind too. You have an orgasm when your mind and emotions can gather the desire and mood to create it and release it throughout body. You cannot be afraid to feel it, you cannot force it, you cannot doubt it. You do any of that and you'll get no where but frustration. The more frustration you feel the less likely you'll be able to get any concentration at all, and then it will be impossible to orgasm. You need to relax, and let your mind and body take over. Work your body real good, find your spots and likes. Stimulate your body and just relax. Concentrate on how good it feels. Once you can relax, now you have to create that need for an orgasm in yourself. Let your pleasure travel to your stomach, clit, everywhere really. Feel a great warmth build up. From every pleasurable feeling you have in your body, let a little bit of it go to your stomach. Each pleasurable sensation sending a little more to your buildup. Every thought, every desire, all collecting together. Get that, then continue to let your body get warmer, and more tense. Take the pleasure your feeling in your body and feel the tingles and waves of warmth travel up and down, and focus those sensations. Start focusing that buildup and let it grow bigger and bigger. Once you find that desire to orgasm and start building it up inside. Concentrate now on your need to have that orgasm. You no longer desire an orgasm, now it's all about how bad you've got to have it. Let your body tremble and get more tense, feel muscles build tension as your body fills up with a really strong build up. Concentrate on how good that build up feels and how bad you want to release it. Work your body faster now and relax your tension now and tell yourself you are ready to have it now. Allow that pressure to release all at once, pushing it all down between your legs, then releasing it all in one large wave all at once. Feeling an intense release of the buildup you were gathering from all over body. Feel it flood out now like an eruption. Don't force it out, let it come naturally. You don't force it out with your body, squeezing tightly and pushing won't do it (this isn't labor). You release it when your mind is ready to release it. Relax and just express yourself through the pleasure you are having and let it come naturally. You have to be able to feel yourself, open your mind, and just let go. Be completely comfortable with yourself and let your mind take over.
That's all I can really suggest from there it's up to trying it out and experimenting. Just remember it's mind over body when it comes to orgasm.
2. Most women stop there once they can have orgasms without putting further thought into what can come next. As I said above, an orgasm is more mental than it is body. So what if you can get good at controlling the mental part of the orgasm to the point where you get so good at having them you can literally control when, how long, and how fast you have them? You can. :) You can learn more control through anticipation of the orgasm, and creating the need to have the final moment of it. This is hard because it requires an open mind with all doubts aside and just letting yourself completely go. Some just can't because they can never be open enough to themselves to believe in such an idea to ever do it successfully. Now onto the best and most successful way I've shown others how to do it. Start playing like any other time. But more than anything just concentrate on building an orgasm. Just concentrate on your need to climax that you fill yourself up with anticipation of a hot orgasm. Collect the buildup faster than normal by concentrating on needing the orgasm so bad you've got to have it now. You may want to stop touching (or being touched by partner) now and have absolutely no physical sexual pleasure going on right now. Now you can focus on using your mind alone to keep building the orgasm. It becomes difficult if you can't keep interested in it but it will work if you believe it will. If this becomes too difficult keep doing it with touching. Use your anticipation as your tool. One way of doing this, you can set a pace for yourself by counting backwards as a way to set a pace. Sounds funny to orgasm from counting backwards, but I found this actually works best. It's not the counting that makes you orgasm, it's not magic. It's setting the mood, the pace, that anxious buildup and anticipation. Telling your body this is what you want, and when. I will count right here in case you printed this out and want kind of an outline for it. You follow the counting and create the orgasm out of your desires alone until you can climax when the counting as reached 0. Each second passing you will feel closer to orgasm as your mind will set pace to this counting to the point of a rhythm. Start counting now starting from 10. Concentrating only on feeling the need for your orgasm. Build your desire. Build your anticipation for the moment you reach 0 so you can climax.
10. You feel heat gathering more and more as your body gathers your thoughts and needs and all your desires as you start to build an orgasm.
9. Your body is trembling from the excitement this is causing.
8. Your breathing becomes more intense.
7. You feel your body getting tenser as your orgasm continues to build.
6. You're beginning to shiver more as the anticipation of this building orgasm builds up.
5. You are halfway there and starting to really want it bad.
4. Your entire body is getting warmer as you get closer and closer to releasing.
3. You're getting really close now, you feel your body ready to erupt.
2. You want it so bad now your shaking.
1. You're about to cum, your body is really tense now and you are going to release it any second.
0. You're going to cum. All at once all that sexual desire and need you built up surges out all at once as you feel an orgasm erupt out of your anticipation that you had built up out of your strong desire and need to cum.
If this didn't work, don't get discouraged. Sometimes a bigger number is needed. Just keep practicing with it. Learn how to anticipate the orgasm. You can't think quot;maybe it will work maybe it won'tquot;. You have to KNOW you are going to have that orgasm because you want it so bad. Counting also isn't for everyone. The idea of counting is to set a pace for yourself so you can control building better. It also keeps your mind occupied with what ur doing and not on your doubts or other things. But maybe for you a fantasy is what you need, and when you cum in that fantasy you cum in reality. It's not easy for everyone to do, especially from a text file. You need to learn to control your desires to point where it becomes easier and soon you may be able to do it. This does work when the mind is put to it just right. You just have to be open, willing, and be free of doubt. Most importantly you just have to be able to let go. It's about self control and being able to feel yourself. Once you do it a few times and get hang of it, you can use it to build some intense orgasms and have many more in a single session of sex or masturbation. Just do it again and again and have some intense multiples. Repeat counting, or multiple fantasies where you cum every time in fantasy. Then you keep them rolling out as you get so aroused you just can't stop and you have as many orgasms as your body can handle. This is good especially for those of you who have bad or quick partners who need to build them up faster and better to compensate. Those of you with good partners or who get into it really well yourselves, you're in for a really long hot session. :) Some can step it down even more after experience and go from 10 seconds down to 5, or drop the counting and just think quot;ok, ok, ok, now!quot;. It's hard for me to direct this any better than what I've just provided because this has a major variation in every persons pace. But with the idea in your head now you'll find it at your pace eventually even if you don't the first time.
3. Once you learn to control them much better there are a few other tricks you can do with it. I won't cover them all because I suppose the idea's are unlimited really. But now that you can control how fast you can build an orgasm and releasing them more at your will, now you will also be better at NOT releasing them with your will. What if you instead not let yourself have it? Continue building it up, letting your desire to orgasm continue to grow, and your need to feel release become so intense it's overwhelming. You continue to go faster and faster but do not let yourself orgasm. Instead keep building it up until you can't handle it anymore. The longer you build it up the better it will be. If it becomes too hard, keep telling yourself that the longer you hold it in, the bigger the buildup is, and more powerful the orgasm is when released. Doing this, you can release a more massive single orgasm instead of having a series of spread out ones. Then from this it's always fun to follow it up with a few quick ones though. Now, when you are ready try, start building it with your control. This time however, do something a little different and when you reach 1, or point in fantasy when you cum, hold that count or image and don't finish it. Trap the intense sensation right in that moment before orgasm. Feel the need to finish so badly getting stronger and stronger. Hold it there. Wait until it gets so intense you feel like your body is in constant orgasm just from the anticipation and intense pleasure of the buildup being so strong. Then release it all at once exploding in a massive orgasm.
There are many more tricks with controling. It's all about experimenting. So just keep exploring your body and your feelings and learning all you can do with it to maximize your experience.
In closing. Never doubt what you can do. Always look for ways to further your pleasure by experimenting and keeping your mind open. Don't doubt what is possible. All this and much more is possible. Follow link below now to read some individual experiences from women who've tried these things and had success in their own different ways.
Updated: 02/16/05
Written by: Adam Williams